tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11789157.post2257001040757586926..comments2024-02-14T05:39:29.497-06:00Comments on HELL BURNS: MOVIES: "NOVITIATE"Sr. Helena Burns, fsphttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09196121481873845379noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11789157.post-80200937939081872082017-12-04T23:32:20.034-06:002017-12-04T23:32:20.034-06:00I haven't seen it yet - just the trailer and s...I haven't seen it yet - just the trailer and some clips but I cannot adequately describe the emotional impact it had on me. I was just past my 18th birthday when I joined a semi-cloistered order in 1960. I stayed for nine years and finally left in utter despair, unable to reconcile all the suffering I saw in the world with the idea of a loving God.<br />The public humiliation and penances never discouraged me, but they wounded me far more than I ever realized.( I am 75 years old and spent a therapy session last week sobbing about long buried memories.) At one point, the Mistress of Novices ordered me to make a "necklace" stringing together pieces of plates, cups and assorted things I had broken and to wear it in public. The harder I tried not to break anything, the more I failed. I was repeatedly given the penance of "praying in Chapel". This entailed leaving my choir stall and going to the center of the chapel, kneeling, kissing the floor, extending my hands in the form of a cross and saying out loud, three time, "Jesus obedient onto death, even to death on the cross, teach me the true spirit of religious obedience." I kissed the feet of the Sisters in the refectory, I prostrated outside the chapel as the nuns walked over my body. I publicly accused myself of my faults, to name just some of the acts of public penance and humiliation we were subjected to. At one point, the Mistress of Novices brought in a "charm teacher" b/c I and another novice "Walked like a farmer," had difficulty modulating our voices, controlling our boundless energy (running up the stairs two at a time) and in general were not nun like in our manner. And after first Profession, I dutifully subjected my body to the lash we were given on the eve of taking our First vows. <br />I bear no anger, no animosity because it was not done to abuse me. It was the culture of the time and it was how nuns were trained. What was lacking was any serious attention to our spiritual development. Not once did any one sit down with me face to face or even in a group to offer any spiritual direction or guidance. I was so ignorant (and had so suppressed all sexual feelings) that I had never heard the word orgasm much less experienced one and yet, I was allowed to take a vow of chastity w/o even knowing what I was giving up. Many years latter I finally realized that "particular friendship" was code for "lesbian relationship." <br />I entered seeking God and left still seeking. My particular journey took me to Buddhism because it gave me a method of going deeper, beyond words and ideas, to the Still Point. <br />Since I haven't seen the movie, I don't know if the sexual scenes were exploitive or not but certainly now, looking back and talking with other ex-nuns, no one can deny that there was some sexual activity that resulted in people being sent home. <br />From what I've seen I can only say it struck a deep and painful chord, not only in me but in other ex-nuns. I believe the training has changed and improved and hope that Sisters today are able to more fully develop their spiritual lives beyond Stage 3 of James Fowler's Stages of Faith https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_W._Fowler<br />I'm not going to quibble about the things they may have gotten wrong, I can only tell you from what I've seen and from two of my friends who are ex-nuns and saw the movie, that it captured the pain, humiliation, and lack of religious formation that caused so many of us to leave. This flawed film reflects much of what the Church got wrong and has attempted to set it right. <br /> Maureen Fordhttp://hellburns.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11789157.post-51865732060944091382017-11-28T17:09:35.871-06:002017-11-28T17:09:35.871-06:00Just saw Novitiate. What a mess it is! It makes th...Just saw Novitiate. What a mess it is! It makes the vulgar but farcical The Little Hours look like Diary of a Country Priest by comparison. Novitiate further perpetuates the pseudo-history that Vatican II changed the Mass and promoted universalism. The characters say "changes" so often and with little elaboration as to what those "changes" are that it becomes a meaningless word. Melissa Leo, while a good actress, becomes such a caricature of a traditionalist mother superior. I wonder how her character would've reacted if they, I don't know, actually read the documents!<br /><br />Oh, and apparently lesbianism cures anorexia. Goodness me... :/BlueFox94https://www.blogger.com/profile/14195892941224578493noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11789157.post-11766901369110046322017-11-03T14:54:15.354-05:002017-11-03T14:54:15.354-05:00Thanks for saving me $15.Thanks for saving me $15.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com